The Balloon Song Lyrics

If you ever got real mad and punched a solid object,
Or kicked a hole in the wall inside your best friends new apartment
Well then this songs for you
I'm here to teach you something special
A brand new way to release your anger
Without even hurting yourself

Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go
Let me tell you
This technique will blow your mind
You'll want to give me a big hug,
Go

I hope you're ready, listen up
You're gonna need a balloon
If you're watching me now
You're in luck cause I'll provide it for you
Now all you gotta do is push it hard against your booty
Take a seat
Hop up and down until you feel that gravity

Oh, wait. Oh, wait. Oh, wait. Oh, wait.
I forgot to tell you I'll be grading you
By how many balloons that you pop
One balloon is crappy
I guess I'll give you a D
Two balloons is average
On this test you get a C
Three is pretty good
You'll get a B for the day
Four or more, now that's amazing
I'll give you an A

Get ready
Get ready
Grab a balloon
On your mark
Ready. Set. Go!

Now you know
The secret's out
Tell all your friends
Spread the word
If you're still punching walls
Then you're a fucking dummy
Don't punch a wall
Cause that's just funny

Now you know
The secret's out
Tell all your friends
Spread the word
If you're still punching walls
Then you're a fucking dummy
Don't punch a wall
Cause that's just funny

Dance.