One Quarter Viking, Three Quarter's Pussy Lyrics

Brian Posehn

Grandpa Metal

Lyrics to One Quarter Viking, Three Quarter's Pussy
Long swords, Viking ships
Endless battles and tales of Yore
My Nordic ancestors
Had battle axes and looked like Thor
I've never swung a sword
Or a battle axe in my life
But I sure as hell
have gotten a mani-pedi with my wife
I'm A Mess
My Nordic folks would hate me
Because I may be
One quarter Viking, three quarters pussy
I'm so fucked
My Nordic folks would kill me
because I might be,
One quarter Viking, three quarters pussy
These sons of Odin
Fought bears and fucking conquered shit
I'm fat. And if I held
a sword I'd probably stab my tits
I' d be so raped and
pillaged in my Viking village
If I was chased I'd
get caught and blood would spillage
I have pot tits
Amon Amarth would hate me
Because I may be
One quarter Viking, three quarters pussy
On a Viking long
ship I wouldn't last an hour
Any word of battle
I would shit my pants and cower
I'm a fat shit
Now my Gramma would hate me
Because I may be
One quarter Viking, three quarters pussy