It's the Liquor Lyrics

If you wake up in the morning with a brain that feels like liquor
It's the liquor (it's the liquor)
Does the sight of ham and eggs make you just a little sicker?
It's the liquor (it's the liquor)
You say your arms are getting thinner and your thighs are getting thicker
When the doctor calls to tell you there's a problem with your ticker
When you ram the car in front just to read the bumper sticker
It's the liquor

When you take your freeway off ramp and wind up in Costa Rica
It's the liqua (it's the liquor)
I'm always free on Monday but I'm not a goldbricker
It's the liquor (it's the liquor)
When you stagger into court and the jury sit and snicker
When you can't stand the sermon every Sunday by the vicar
When your girlfriend says she's never had a lover that was quicker
It's the liquor

If you've ever bought a bridge from a well-dressed city slicker
It's the liquor (it's the liquor)
Has your flaming love affair cooled down to just a flicker
It's the liquor (it's the liquor)
You say your favorite alibi no longer seems to trick her
And every time you're with your sweetheart, all you do is fight and bicker
And when your knees are getting splinters from the dirty barroom floor
That's the lacquer.