If I Were A Tree Lyrics

If I were a tree, I'd fall on your house and crush everything you own.
If I were a truck, well I'd run over your dog and I'd leave him on your porch.
If I were a dam, well I'd break in your home town and cause a terrible flood.
If I were a shark, well I'd learn to walk on land just to kill everyone you love.
If I were a bus I'd drive right past your stop on rainy days just to make you walk
But I wouldn't be the kid that throws things at your kid, oh hell no I would be the rock.
If I were your boss, I would fire you today, like you were Milton from Office Space.
And if I weren't such a spineless guy, I'd be saying this to your face.