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Soundtrack: I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change Title: Satisfaction Guaranteed (Wolf howl) Man So, how was I? Woman Oh, you were good Man You mean good or UNBELIEVABLE? Woman Oh, stop it! I can't take it anymore. You were terrible. I didn't get any pleasure. Not only didn't the earth move, the bed hardly rocked. Oh, I wish there were something I could do about it. Announcer Hello! Did you ever wish you could sue someone because they didn't satisfy you sexually? Well good news, now you can! At Gechovian, Myers, Masters, and Johnson we have a large staff of sexually experience attorneys who wanna get into your bedroom and get you the orgasm you deserve! Let's take a look at a typical couple engaged in love making. Woman Lower. Higher. Lower. Higher. Ugh. Man Ow, ow! Watch your knees! Woman Ow! Announcer Not very appealing. And all too familiar. Now let's take a look at the same couple with a Gechovian, Myers, Masters, and Johnson attorney present! Attorney I'm sorry, Mr. Elliot, but your contract states you must be nibbling her neck. And Ms. Courtland, his feet must be fondled. Man and woman Oh, right right right. Oh! Oh! Oh! Announcer (Laughs) See how easy it is when you let a no-nonsense litigator handle the negotiations of lovemaking? Your intial consultation is just $25 and your fee can be a portion of your settlement should your partner fail to satisfy your fetishes. Woman I got $5,000 because he missed my G-spot! Man And I got $10,000 because she wouldn't go down on me! Announcer At Gechovian, Myers, Masters, and Johnson if your partner doesn't get you off, we get you money! Back to the I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change Soundtrack |