The Oldest Man On MySpace Lyrics

I'm the oldest man on MySpace,
on the old computer by my rest home bed.
All my blogs are rambling tales of bygone times.
Everyone in my Top Eight is dead.

When I see a teenaged girl
all made up like a whore,
it takes me straight back
to the second world war...

But I know she'll never love
an old fart like me,
which is why I put my age
as 23.

I'm the oldest man on MySpace,
wheezing to a My Chemical Romance song.
I'm writing out my will in glitter text.
I'm giving everything to Tom...
Whippersnapper.

O..M..G..
Less..than..three
L..O..L..
What's that smell?

Oops.

I'm the oldest man on MySpace
I'm the oldest man on MySpace
I'm the oldest man on MySpace
I'm the oldest man on MySpace
I'm the oldest man on MySpace

(typing noises)
(thud)