3 Legged Race Lyrics

Well I woke up really early
on my anniversary
Wife told me to meet her
at the house for lunch around 3
Well I showed up real early
with flowers in my hand
Walked into the front door
there stood a one-legged man
and he told me that he loved my wife
and she was good in bed
Well I punched him in the mouth
and then I ran off with his leg
Bitch 3 legged raced off with my heart

I felt kinda bad
stealing that fella's fake leg
although that motherfucker
fucked my wife in my own bed
Well I thought I'd return it
then I'd head out for the bar
to my surprise
that man n my wife
stole my fuckin' car
so I moved out everything I could
except that fuckin' bed
and laughed as I walked out the door
cuz I still had his leg
Bitch 3 legged raced off
That bitch 3 legged raced off with my heart

I don't know if you knew him
but we used to be good friends
we'd go out late night talking
'bout strange places we'd been
little did I know
that fucker talked about my wife
That one legged fucker
one legged hopped
hopped off with my wife
Bitch 3 legged raced off
That bitch 3 legged raced off
That bitch 3 legged raced off with my heart

Well every time that I'm feeling sad
I look up at that leg
just knowing that he's wobbling
makes me feel good instead
I smile when I think about him
fucking in my bed
cuz doggy style is impossible
when you only got one leg
Bitch 3 legged raced off
That bitch 3 legged raced off
That bitch 3 legged raced off with my heart